Christmas Light Hacks with Dad

Being the husband of a self-diagnosed Christmas addict comes with many responsibilities.

My Dad has spent the last 22 years building his Christmas light skills. While he is very much guilty of releasing many heinous curse words during the process each year, he has slowly perfected his trade.

Over the years he he has learned some lessons that have become endlessly valuable to him, and before starting the process he takes the time to review them… or rather, my siblings and I like to remind him of them.

He has very kindly agreed (against his will) to let me share these lessons with you, so that you don’t make the same mistakes that he has.

Enjoy.

 

1. Don’t

Lesson one is by far the most crucial.

If you can pay someone else to put up your Christmas lights, do it. If not, train your kids to do it and sit back with a beer.

2. Footwear

Don’t wear thongs when you’re on the roof.

Falling off isn’t pleasant, and he can tell you that from experience.

3. Clips

Buy at least double the amount of gutter clips that you think you need. They will either snap or completely disappear.

4. Surroundings

Be aware of your surroundings at all times. Take care to dodge birds, hornets and cricket balls… the roof is a dangerous place to be.

Also, take care not to leave things at the base of the ladder. Surely you can figure out why.

5. Rope

Fairy lights are much easier to work with, but if a bulb blows or you… accidentally… step on one, you’re done for.

Rope lights solve the problem, but getting them to sit perfectly is quite the task. If you unroll them a few days prior, they become much more flexible.

6. Ladder

While you’re on the roof, it’s a good idea to keep the ladder in the same place at all times. The hot sun can make you forget things.

7. Buy

If you’re Christmas light shopping and your significant other sees an intricate light up lawn ornament or sign, don’t volunteer to make your own to save the cash.

They will only end up resenting you for taking 10 years (and counting) to do it, so just buy the darn thing.

8. Victory

Go into the process with the understanding that you will want to throw in the towel almost immediately. This way, you’re not up for disappointment.

Simply think of the victory beer and ride the wave to the end.

9. Packing Up

Put off pulling them down for as long as you possibly can. If you delay it for long enough, you won’t even have to put them up next year.

10. Input

If you have any creative input, consult your partner first rather than just going for it. It will save you a great deal of time and energy.

 

If any Mums or Dads out there have any other valuable lessons to add, feel free to share them in the comments.

Until tomorrow, 😉